It’s not forever: A gentle homeschool reminder. (Starring Guns and Roses.)
There’s going to come a time when it gets old — this having one car thing.
But for now, on this snowy afternoon, it’s pretty OK.
I think it helps that it’s not forever.
I was thinking about not-forever recently — my kids were taking Christmas break seriously, playing lots of video games and enjoying more candy and treats than normal.
There was a day I found myself ready to get pretty irritated about that, until I reminded myself that a break isn’t really a break if we keep doing all the old regular things.
And so, I took a deep breath, and ate some chocolate with crushed up candy canes in it and I felt better.
There have been so many things over the years that have driven me crazy simply because I’ve lost perspective. A child who no longer wanted to nap, for instance, was once enough to bring me to my knees.
It’s not as bad as it sounds. I was hiding. I was hiding in a nook between my bed and the wall because I just needed 5 minutes.
I think it might have actually been a game now, come to think of it …
But sometimes, as a homeschooling mom, I forget that stages come and go, and “educational standards” are completely arbitrary and made up anyway.
I forget that I am a bit of a rebel.
I forget to ask, “Who says!” and instead find myself worrying that my children will suffer if I don’t force them to learn all their multiplication tables right this minute.
I mean, we prefer slow math with window crayons any day.
Which brings me back to this having one car business.
Having one car is very manageable for the time being. I am baking more, because I have time to let things rise. (These English muffins are amazing.)
I am looking at my kids more, because they are beside me instead of the in the back seat.
We are even reading together more — I am making tea every afternoon, and we are finally finishing this book, which is wonderful.
I am communicating with my husband more, because we have to know what the other has going on; lest someone get left somewhere.
And it is very cold. That would be very bad.
Most things are tolerable (even enjoyable) when you know they are not going to stretch into forever.
And then … there are things that you want to last forever, and they go by way too fast.
But that’s another post, I think.
So enjoy your kids’ imperfect ages and stages today, friends.
Remember:
Nothing lasts forever, and we all know hearts can change.
And it hard to hold a candle, in the cold November rain.
Wait. That’s Guns and Roses.
Much love,
Kara
This is so great. I read the title and I thought, “Is it going to be Patience or November Rain?” 🙂 I love the idea of enjoying your imperfect child in this moment, where they are. Homemade english muffins are the best, and chocolate with crushed candycanes is one of life’s true joys. Enjoy the journey, mama!
I needed this today! We are still on break and I was feeling guilty, but then I read this and felt so much better, because it reminded me of why I am doing what I’m doing. While I was reading, our old school (they must still have my number in their automated system) called and left a message that they are on a two-hour delay. Suckers! I’m not driving anywhere!
I had to laugh at your description of hiding behind the bed. I once hid behind the bathroom door from my then-2 year after hours of trying to get him to sleep. So I was standing there crying and he came looking for me, decided it was a game, and stood beside me wailing as loudly as he could. He’s now 22 and I laugh every time I think about that night. It really doesn’t last forever.
Aww! Thanks Cait!
Suckers! Ha! That just about made me spit my tea across the room 🙂 Seriously, though — I love how cozy homeschooling feels right now. (Make sure to remind me of that in March when I am stir-to-the-crazy.) 😉
I know! Too fast. I wish I had a time machine and could go back to those days and whisper — “Hey, you’re actually going to look back on this moment and smile, and don’t worry — you won’t be super wrinkly yet when it happens.”
I so enjoy your writing! I remind myself often that those school standards are all made up, as I watch my 6 year old with his engineer brain spend hours on legos 🙂 I remind myself,when the short vowels sounds are not coming along smoothly, how much he loves books and will continue to love them if I don’t force those short vowels before he’s ready! I love loving this slow life at home and I think my boys do, too 🙂
love this post!! I am sharing it for sure…
Thank you Catherine! 🙂
Thank you! I got a good laugh at having just one of everything! All of us are getting over colds and just being, which makes me anxious. I feel more relaxed after reading this. I plan to take it up a notch with hot chocolate.
I love how authentic you write.
Over here it is quite hot (New Zealand) so we take at least a month off schooling and simply enjoy Christmas, the New Year and the warmer weather. Not looking forward to getting back into in Feb.
I committed to going down to one vehicle for one year. There were so many benefits to it. Mostly it forced me to say NO! 🙂 I was pregnant with the third child at the time so there were rough days, but all in all I loved it. I wish for the simplicity again. It was a decision I made after this book… http://www.neebo.com/Textbook/radicalb9781601422217/ISBN-9781601422217?kpid=1-60142-221-0&gclid=Cj0KEQiAuMOlBRDf6_izz93n-pEBEiQAsJCJWrvrEEBkbUnqQ8JeM9o6tdFlVxSvZUlIoXlVWPw7-ogaAtL28P8HAQ
We were one car for many years, but it did have many unexpected benefits…simplicity being one. Also, found out that I really like where I live (and I don’t live close to any thing) and if you really like where you live you don’t mind being there more often. And, yes, I did bake a lot more!
Such a good thing to remember! Nothing lasts forever. And it really does go by quickly. My boys are 14 and 12 (almost 13) and I’ve been homeschooling them since they were toddlers. We have enjoyed most of the journey… but there are definitely rough days thrown in here and there. However, a blink a few times and then my boys are through with whatever it was that was throwing us for such a loop and on to the next stage. I can hardly believe how little time I have left with them before they move out and start their own lives. Cherish the time, Mamas! <3
Love this. And I love your mama heart. When you mentioned G+R–a total high school FAVE–I figured you weren’t talking about “I Used to Love Her.” November Rain makes more sense 😉