Kara S. Anderson

Homeschool connection, not perfection.

Stop trying to do it all in your homeschool

by Kara S. Anderson 2 Comments

Well first, let me apologize for the bossy title.

I’m not normally so forceful, it’s just that I happen to have encountered a lot of moms lately who are dealing with burn-out.

Like, drag-me-up-off-the-floor-to-make-a-quesadilla level of burn-out and exhaustion.

I think a lot of things can cause us to burn out, and right now, I think a lot of us are still coping with pandemic exhaustion.

Yesterday I was talking with some friends and we decided that the pandemic has made everything at least 15 percent harder.

Everything.

Some things are even harder than that.

  • My son opening a bank account –  at least 40 percent harder than it used to be.
  • Our family just bought a car – minimum 50 percent harder than it was two years ago when we bought a car.

And this applies to everything right now.

Enough

Yesterday on the way to physical therapy, I realized I forgot a mask, which is still required at the clinic. I found one ON THE FLOOR OF MY CAR, picked it up, inspected it, and put it on my face.

Near my mouth.

Where the food goes.

(Speaking of food – food is just always hard. Forever. Send Doordash.)

So if you are like me, you are always looking for ways to make things a bit easier.

That’s where this post comes in.

And my bossy tone.

Giving up?

Because none of us feels like it’s OK to give up, right?

Our culture tells us moms are supposed to work hard, be exhausted, surrender to the messy house and messy bun, and then start drinking wine at 4 p.m.

Yikes. (Yikes about the wine being the answer – I have proudly rocked a messy bun pretty much every day of my life since college).

We’re constantly told that to BE ENOUGH, we have to DO “ENOUGH.”

Now, I wrote a whole book about how this is not true, but still, I get haunted by the lies. They sneak up on me like ninjas whispering: “your bathroom sink is gross right now, you Complete Failure As a Human Being.”

Doing less in your homeschool

A while back, I sent out an email to my blog friends (you guys!) asking about your Number 1 struggle with homeschooling.

It was kind of incredible – the answers varied, but many, many of them said the same thing: being consistent.

Now I’m not saying I have all the answers, but I definitely think I have an answer to this:

Do Less.

Doing less it just easier than doing more. It’s a lower barrier to entry. It’s attainable and therefore less intimidating to start.

I know – we think homeschooling isn’t supposed to be easy, because then we aren’t “doing enough“.

But I promise you, that isn’t the case.

And if trying to do it all is causing you to feel exhausted and burned out, you’re kind of shooting yourself in the foot, friend.

Simplified homeschooling

The past several weeks, my daughter and I have been doing a pared down, simplified version of homeschooling.

And amazingly, we’ve been really consistent about it.

Here’s the thing: Less is more when you do it more often.

 

Of course lots of other stuff is getting sprinkled in here and there. We’re constantly sharing books, but overall, this is our simple structure since my surgery back in March.

And you know how I know it’s enough?

Every day Almost every day, we get through most of these. (Except we save one day a week and do a science deep dive with our forensics kits.)

Almost every day, I can cross off subjects in our planner, and move on feeling good.

Is it perfect? No.

Is it fancy? No

Is it infinitely Instgrammable? Gosh no.

Do those things really matter?

Hell to the No.

A mindset shift

So as you plan our your days and weeks, I have a few resources for you to simplify things:

 

If you aren’t familiar with the idea of Cactus Schooling, you can head here.

 

Sending virtual hugs friends, and a reminder that you don’t have to do it all to homeschool really well.

I promise. 💙

This post contains affiliate links.

Meet my favorite new homeschool planners!

by Kara S. Anderson Leave a Comment

I have spent years beating my head against the wall over homeschool planning.

Part of me always wants to be chiller than I actually am. We’re interest-led learners here.

RELAX, I scream (quietly) to myself at 4 a.m.

But I just can’t. It’s not who I am, and so over the years I have tried several different approaches to planning.

I’ve tried “reverse,” planning, or writing down what we do after the fact. This is comforting to me when I get caught up in a cycle of worrying that we aren’t doing enough.

It’s also comforting when I buy my kids a new video game, and they only want to play that game, and I need written proof that they are doing other things and that I’m not just raising those children who grow up to become adults who scream their gameplay on YouTube, but let’s face it, are also millionaires.

More structure

But, there have been other times when one or more of us has craved more structure.

That’s when I implement my 6-weeks at a time planning approach, which I talk about in my book and share more about here.

The truth is, some level of planning helps me. It helps me focus on what’s most important, it helps me stay focused and it helps me know what’s coming, which means a lot for my anxious mama soul.

Even if I go willy-nilly, or skip a week – it helps me to have things written down and out of my brain.

My new favorite planner

Recently I was on my friend Jessica’s site – The Waldock Way – grabbing one of her amazing Who Was unit Studies when I stumbled across her planners.

I asked her for a peek inside and friends – you need to take a look.

Jessica’s planners are some of the most complete homeschool planners I’ve seen, including both everything you need for planning, but also specific pages for record keeping.

Maybe best of all – she has 4 options.

OK. That’s actually not the best of all. Jessica and I have a shared love of Harry Potter – we often suggest people bundle her Waldock Wizards and Wands with my Herbology Unit Study to create Hogwarts in Your Homeschool – so of course she has an amazing Harry Potter inspired planner!

But just in case HP isn’t your thing, her other homeschool planners include a bold colors option, a pastel option and a … flamingo option.

Planner Features!

All of Jessica’s beautifully constructed planners include:

  • weekly and monthly planning
  • a records section
  • resources for unit study planning
  • and a weekly meal planning page! (seriously! Bonus Jonas!)
  • morning basket planning pages (and bedtime basket planning!)
  • a game log
  • a book log
  • and a page for passwords because I can not be the only one tired of trying to remember everything plus a capital letter, plus a symbol ohmahgoodness.

What I love most!

But maybe what I love most (besides the amazing design of the Harry Potter Planner) is that Jessica gives you options:

  • you can choose a Sunday or Monday start
  • you receive an editable version if you are techy and fancy!
  • the planners include the whole year if you homeschool year-round or don’t follow the traditional school schedule
  • there are options for 4-day and 5-day school weeks

Honestly, these planners are so thoughtfully designed, and are such a bargain.

Plus, I got mine printed at Office Depot, and it’s gorgeous. 😍 P.S. They do binding there too!

So if you are looking for a do-it-all homeschool planner this year, head over to Jessica’s shop, and while you’re there, check out her other amazing products.

Happy planning!!

P.S. Speaking of Jessica’s amazing products, I have one more for you to check out!

Her new Waldock Way Guide to Homeschooling a simple, open and go guide to homeschooling, perfect for those just starting out, those looking for a simple guide this planning season and those who would love some reassurance and new ideas.

And the bargain price, you guys – it’s just $5.

But it’s PACKED with awesomeness including …

Tips for:

– creating a routine

– turning around a bad day and 

– making learning fun

Plus:

– Checklists for pre-school through 8th grade!

– Tips for homeschooling high school

– Advice from experts (I even have a little blurb in there!)

– Helpful links

– Planning printables and more

Be sure to check it out here.

This post is brought to you in partnership with The Waldock Way and contains affiliate links. All opinions are my own.

The golden morning routine that changed everything

by Kara S. Anderson 1 Comment

Part of me wanted to shout about this from the rooftops weeks ago. That’s how excited I was.

But, I wanted to wait to see if this new thing wasn’t just a temporary boost – a little oomph that would fade and I would end up back where I so often am, feeling disorganized, frustrated, and worn out.

Running around with no end goals or guideposts in place is exhausting, right?

How do we know if we’re even accomplishing ANYTHING?

And as moms, we need those success markers sometimes, I think. So much of what we’re doing is on desperate repeat – dishes, laundry, bedtime, repeat …

So much of our work takes time to show itself. Are we raising wonderful, creative, loving people, or will our beloved little ones grow up and turn into Catfish villains?

A solid morning routine

And so today, finally, I want to share with you the morning routine that has changed everything.

I’m trying to think if that’s hyperbole, and I really don’t think it is. Having a solid morning routine has helped me to feel more organized, more put-together, which makes me more confident.

It’s helped me feel stronger, calmer and it feels easier to deal with the constant disruptions (eruptions) that happen during a mom’s day.

So yes – I’m going with it.

This routine has been gold for me. Maybe it will be for you too?

Or maybe my routine will serve as a template for you to create your own golden routine.

In fact, I’m making a free printable to help you do just that.

>>Grab it here<<

Why routine?

I thrive with routine, but I am terrible at creating and implementing routines. Which means in order to a create a brand new, successful, sustainable morning routine, I started by cruising around Pinterest for about a week.

Honestly – it’s all an algorithm over there, so the minute you click on one routine post, 7,000 more auto-populate (along with ads for bras and Activia yogurt.)

This is when I started a little larceny.

When I saw a morning idea that sounded good, I stole it and put it on a list.

I did this for a while. It was a good list.

A BIG list.

Then I considered what I needed.

I needed – no, I wanted more intentional mornings.

Clearly, the entire list was not for me. If Essentialism has taught me anything, it’s that we have to be careful what we bring in.

It’s like our cars, right? They’re not very large. So we bring in 22 travel mugs and 15 books and 11 granola bars, plus things our kids need – whoops – and it’s all overwhelming.

Whatever we say yes to, it means we’re saying no to other things.

And I have other things that are important like work and homeschooling my kids and cooking meals and literally herding cats. I’m sure you have your things too.

So Rule No. 1 is to not create an insane, unattainable morning routine.

If you can’t get enough sleep, or if you are trying to fit in too much before your kids wake up, it’s going to take about 3 days for the whole routine to seem like too much and like maybe it was a bad idea in the first place, and on Day 4 maybe you’ll just sleep in until someone wakes you by handing you their diaper.

Routines and Seasons

Speaking of which I am no longer in the diaper days, but I remember them well, and back then, if some lady on the internet would have shared a routine like I’m about to share, I would have told her to eat a glass salad.

It’s important to keep in mind that life has seasons, and in some seasons you’ll be able to do more in certain areas, and in others you’ll need to do less in those areas and that’s just being human.

So another option is that you can break up your morning routine, and make it more of a daily routine.

I actually think this can be helpful for moms with small kids and moms doing a lot of hands-on homeschooling with their kids.

Some kids need A LOT. And this past year especially, we’ve all given a lot as parents.

So it might be handy to add in smaller routines throughout the day to help maintain your energy, your patience and your, um … sanity.

Maybe you exercise for 10-20 minutes in the morning, read a book after lunch, and hide in the tub before bed.

Whatever YOU need. However YOU can get it.

Different needs

Speaking of which, we all have different needs and different things that fill us up.

Take some time to consider what you need. Envision your perfect morning, then remember that you have a dog and three cats and two kids and the plumber is coming and someone has to make breakfast.

Still, I highly recommend doing what I did and taking a bit of time to brainstorm what could help you best.

They say that what you do in the morning sets the tone for the day, and sometimes I want to punch people who say things like that, but as much as it’s possible, it is nice to imagine a pleasant morning, and see what we can do to make that happen as regularly as possible.*

*Not all the time because 6 months ago someone made dentist appointments at 8:15. Ahem.

It’s starts with waking

Here’s the part where I tell you you need to stop using your phone as your alarm clock, but don’t worry, what I really mean is stop using your phone’s built-in, obnoxious-arse ringtones to wake up.

None of them are pleasant. Most are like some kind of MacGyver-era count-down until the nuclear reactor blows.

They’re startling, and that’s NOT a good way to wake up.

Instead, I have two options. The first is to download some pleasant ringtones or an album that is calming, and use the songs on the album as ringtones. My friend Carla recommended this album and it’s the best for ringtonification.

Another option is a peaceful alarm clock that wakes you up slowly and gently using light and/or friendly noise. My mom bought me this one for my birthday and I love it. It’s also a sleep machine, reading light and plays meditations and simple yoga routines.

I think my Hatch helps me get to sleep better too, and that sets me up for better mornings.

The first thing I do

The first thing I do when I wake up to my Nordic Sunrise and Tibetan Bells (really!) is think of 10 things I am grateful for.

I know that sounds like a lot, but it continues to get easier. And I often list some of the same things.

Don’t worry – it’s not a pop quiz, it’s just a really lovely way to start your day.

Research shows that gratitude helps release dopamine and serotonin, two feel-good hormones.

It also, “regulates the sympathetic nervous system that activates our anxiety responses, and at the psychological level, it conditions the brain to filter the negative ruminations and focus on the positive thoughts,” according to PositivePsychology.com.

And it takes less than a minute and you can literally do it with your eyes closed.

Next Steps

This is when my morning routine really kicks into gear.

I brush my teeth, <— (I have a toothbrush crush), put in my contacts and wash my face, then I spend 5 minutes tidying my bedroom, opening my windows or shades to let in light, and then light a candle.

I feed the cats and start tea, then bring my little teapot and a mug upstairs and meditate.

My favorite app for meditation is Insight Timer.

Next, I journal for three pages.

I like these simple notebooks because they are less expensive than a hardbound version (plus you get three in a set) and if I get really angsty, I can toss it in the fireplace when I’m done.

(I journal in bed, so I use a lap desk. These are also great for portable work and homeschooling.)

I got the three pages idea from this book, but you could do one page if you are short on time or skip this all together. I just feel like getting feelings out on paper is really cathartic for me.

After that, I take my medicine, vitamins and have breakfast. (Usually a smoothie – use this link for $25 off Daily Harvest.)

Always have a daily to-do list

Then I start on my daily to do list.

I don’t always get to everything on my to-do list, and I purposely keep my to-do lists small. But if I don’t have one at all, it’s a hot mess in a dress situation, so I make one every day.

For a long time I would do a to-do list on a Post-It note, but then I bought one of these notebooks and now I use the front “dashboard” with a dry erase marker.

Is it that easy?

Yes. That’s it.

My new morning routine

All of this – especially the gentle start and the to-do list, set me up to have a brighter, clearer, less stressful day.

I know that as my kids get going and I check email, things are going to get busy. But with a good start, it all feels more manageable.

How to use your phone to make your morning better

Speaking of which, you’ll notice I don’t check social media or email until after my morning routine.

This itself has helped so much.

I used to wake up and it was like a starter pistol had gone off. I was instantly overwhelmed by questions and to-dos.

Now I only use my phone for my meditation app, to check my calendar when making my to-do list, and listening to playlists.

What to do next

Wonder what to do next? Download the free printable here and start brainstorming:

Remember, it may take a bit of time to craft what works best for you.

But stay at it, before long, you’ll have better mornings that will lead to more peaceful days.

Big news! Kara’s book More Than Enough is now available in paperback:

This post contains affiliate links.

Creating a basic daily checklist (FREE printable)

by Kara S. Anderson Leave a Comment

Last week, I was feeling overwhelmed.

This is nothing new.

I am often overwhelmed.

But lately, I’ve been feeling particularly nervous. I have anxiety, and when it comes to fight/flight or freeze, I’m a popsicle.

Some days, just making a full daily plan is too much.

(Other times, it’s what saves me.)

Prioritizing self-care

My therapist has recommended focusing on self-care, but How? When?

So I decided to create a checklist.

The first version was like 62 things long.

I want to tell you – a daily checklist with too many things on it is pointless, especially when you’re anxious. We must practice some Essentialism here.

So I created a bare-bones, simple list.

And then I decided I’d share it, in case you feel overwhelmed right now too.

Something I want to point out – this list has stars on it. There’s a reason for that.

I want you to remember that you are already doing a lot. You’re already getting a lot right. If you got a star for each time you found the blue sippy cup, or smiled at your kids, or remembered to order something your family needs, you would be sparkling like the sun.

So please don’t put more pressure on yourself with this list.

But if you are going days at a time forgetting basics like drinking water and taking your vitamins, I hope this will help.

Here is my list for now:

Hanging On

A LOT of us are hanging on by a thread.

We are homeschooling and parenting. Many of us are caring for parents or other loved ones, dealing with mental health issues, trying to help kids navigate huge feelings and otherwise just trying to do our best.

My hope with this free printable is that it will give you structure and get things out of your head.

Grab your free printable here.

Kara

This post contains affiliate links.