(You can now listen to this one – just click that blue arrow below!)
I am just so glad he didn’t sit on the line …
All those years ago — the pre-school teacher would hold me after class:
“Mrs. Anderson,” she’d say in a patient tone …
(I was 29. I felt like I was the one in trouble.)
“He just doesn’t want to sit on the line during story time.”
During the drive home, my inner rebel would emerge.
What 3 year old does, really?
And I felt the questions bubble up.
Followed by the ideas.
And now I’m just so glad.
When I see them with their friends — a rag-tag group of kids so comfortable with themselves that it never occurs to them to judge each other.
When I peek in their closets at the animal T-shirts and hats and ripped jeans and corduroy jackets and capes.
When I watch them help each other through math, riding bikes, tying shoes. Building great cities of wood and Lego, ruled by herds of tiny animals.
When we cuddle together reading. When I get to see them fall in love with a book. When they help me fall in love all over again.
When I see them master a skill. When I get to watch an idea be born. Whenever I am given the amazing opportunity to see them discover a new passion …
The delight they get out of packing a lunch. And eating it in a hallway with their pals, inside a little church where they take classes like chess and performing arts and nature explorers.
When we go on adventures, discovering cafes and book shops and teeny museums and bakeries and farms and caves.
I get to be there. I get to be with them.
(Thank you.) 
It was a sign I could have taken so many ways.
I spent so much time worrying when my kids were young, but this one thing — this one huge decision felt so natural and easy.
Let’s never have to sit on the line again, OK?
We stumbled. We still stumble.
And yet every day, we have every day.
And so we sit around the table on Thursday mornings and we learn math and Latin and Shakespeare and history.
And then we pause and watch Kid History.
Because we get to do it our way.
Because perhaps we’re all a little bit rebels — this kid who wouldn’t sit on the line. His mother who refused to sign him up for Kindergarten. The sister who won’t be locked in by what others think. The father who tells friends and strangers, “it’s the right choice for us.”
I may have regrets some day, but I know I will never regret these days.
I’ll never regret the afternoons spent reading together; the library trips; the hikes in the woods.
The mornings surrounded by friend and brownies.
The people. The amazing, kind-hearted kindred spirits who eschewed the line too.
I’ll want more, I think.
I’ll wish it all didn’t go by so fast.
But I’ll never regret for a moment looking at my son in the back seat, and thinking that if I’d ever had a choice, I wouldn’t have sat on the stupid line either.
And so we haven’t.
And I am just so glad.
Every single day.
Kara, I just love this! My daughter is three and definitely not a “line sitter” (neither am I). I want to homeschool her, but also signed her up for PreK at a project-based private school next year, just to try it out. Lately, I’ve been having serious doubts about the PreK thing. This article really helped me put some perspective on it. Thanks!
Your writing makes me want to homeschool. Even though I know it’s not the right choice for us. FYI there comes a time every school year when Dad gets invited in. Cause Mom has said “So?” one too many times.
I just bawled like a baby reading this. Thanks so much for sharing. I love my group of rebels too!
I have one in private school and one in public. And friends who home school. Every time someone steps out of the box, I applaud. One size does not fit all!
Great post! For us the moments were when the future engineer cried over timed tests because he was convinced he was “bad at math”. The test required faster writing than his fine motor skills could deliver. The other moment was during the IEP meeting for our 2E dyslexic when the unhelpful counselor told me, “Every child at this school would benefit from one on one reading time, but that isn’t going to happen.” I’m so glad.
Yes, yes, and yes! This is so well written and such an encouragement! It really sums up beautifully why we chose to homeschool.
I loved this, especially the description of a rag-tag group of kids so comfortable with themselves that it never occurs to them to judge each other. They are the best ones to have.
Absolutely beautiful post. It’s all about having every day, every day. After 20 years of building memories as a homeschooling family, I wouldn’t have done it any other way.
Exactly! I am grateful every day for the experience. Thank you for these beautiful words.
Wow, I got goosebumps reading this, and I couldn’t agree more.
Beautiful! xoxo
I agree. I genuinely like my kids’ friends because they are quirky and interesting!
Thank you Traci. I love hearing that perspective!
I so needed this today. We are still finding our way into an organized homeschool routine again at the beginning of the year. But I needed a reminder of why we quit public school last year, on the brink of middle school.
I cried over timed tests too. Now I’m a software engineer. My engineering husband says he struggled with them too. Turns out right is more important than fast.
This totally hit home for me today! I do a photography project where I take one photo a day and put them all together at the end of the year. Yesterday, I was feeling overwhelmed and considered taking next year off. Then I looked through my 2014 folder and saw just what you wrote about: their lives as homeschoolers, right there in full color (or b&w ahem). It was so affirming to look at those images and see that all of my doubts have no merit and that our choice to do this thang is full of so many beautiful experiences (and memories). What a treasure.
For me, it was a crosswalk. No one explained what it was, but they yelled at me to get in it. Yelled… at a Kindergartener. I remember it 40 years later. I’ve been bucking the system (and walking just outside the crosswalk) ever since. I LOVE staying home with my kiddo. I wanted his school memories to be something other than bossy crosswalk guards. And yes, it is going by much too fast.
Three cheers for living life outside the lines!!
Yes! This is so beautifully written. I wish I had started homeschool sooner but I was too afraid…crazy, right???
Now people ask “you’re not going to do this all the way through high school, are you???”
Silly people. I’m going to do what’s right for us. Right now its homeschool, and I’m so thankful.
Thank you for this post, you hit the nail on the head. We don’t get this time back!
Love this!! Thank you so much for putting into words what so many of us feel! I love spending these days with my twin boys and after 8 years I’m seeing the end up ahead and I want to slow down time!
I know this was written many years ago, but thank you. My son doesn’t sit on the line either. He’s an amazing 5 year old that would be starting kindergarten in the fall. He’s also the boy that just finished reading Treasure Island all by himself and is constantly begging for more books. I simply can’t cram him into the little box of public school kindergarten and expect him to thrive.
I love my kid who can’t sit on the line.
Oh I love this so much!! This reminds me of how I felt when it was my turn to stand in front of the teacher getting in trouble and later, angry. Thank you for this.